What on Earth has happened to The Tree Of Life?

Terrence Malick, why is nothing ever straightforward with you?!  The enigmatic director’s latest film, The Tree of Life, was supposed to be released in the UK on May 4th.  I, like so many others, have been eagerly awaiting this moment ever since the first speculative drips of  a release date began to appear several months ago.  It caused controversy because if it received its world premiere in the UK, as was intended, the film would be ruled out of the Cannes film festival.

Needless to say, May 4th came and went, and there’s no sign of Tree of Life being released in UK cinemas.  The latest I’ve heard is a July 7th release in Australia, with no fixed date for the UK (thanks, Wikipedia).  I guess in the meantime we’ll have to be contented with the teasing trailer and brilliant poster, which promise an epic meditation on life, death, the universe, and everything in between.

http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi612735001/

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5 reasons why I hate Zack Snyder

So, Sucker Punch has reached the UK, fresh from a critical mauling and, let’s face it, abject failure at the US box office.  This is fantastic news! Maybe people are starting to realise that Mr Snyder is in fact a really, really terrible filmmaker!  Here’s my top five reasons why I loathe the man and his lousy movies.

5)  GRATUITOUS SLOW MOTION.  Slow motion definitely was cool back in 1999 when The Matrix came out.  Perhaps it still is cool. It was a bit grating in Animal Kingdom, but on the whole, pretty cool.  When Zack Snyder uses it (i.e. all the time)? NOT COOL!  And since it appears to be his sole cinematic trick, the man’s in trouble!

4)  GRATUITOUS GREEN SCREENS.  Why does the man insist on making films against a silly fake backdrop?! Just like Zemeckis constantly plugging away at the creepy motion-capture animation long after everyone realised it looked shit, Snyder keeps on going with the technique long after we’d all thought Sky Captain And The World Of Tomorrow had proved it worthless.  What happened to the beauty of real life cinematography? Give me some vintage Roger Deakins anyday over Snyder’s computer-generated vistas (more like Windows Vista).

3)  GRATUITOUS CGI VIOLENCE.  I know, I know, it’s his “thing”. It’s nothing new in cinema, and hyper-violence can indeed be fun if it’s done well.  I just have a penchant for real-life gore effects and a strong dislike for CGI blood.  Perfectly-designed swirls of CGI blood really spoiled Wanted for me.  Same goes with 300 – despite the ridiculous costuming and the annoying green screen, I admit that film did look quite nice.  Except for the stupid CGI blood spurting all over the screen! And don’t get me started on the prison scene in Watchmen. You know the one I’m talking about. And you know it was ridiculous.

2)  GRATUITOUS SEX SCENES.  Now, I haven’t seen Sucker Punch yet, but with its bevy of hot girls I’m willing to bet Snyder treats us to some kind of sex scene (or better yet, a rape scene – see reason number 1).  If so, I’m also willing to bet that this sex scene will have very little to no importance to the film’s plot, will be filmed in a completely voyeuristic-teenage-boy-fantasy-esque way, and will almost certainly be in slow motion.  This was just one of the many reasons why I hated 300 and Watchmen.

1)  GRATUITOUS MISOGYNY.  Or rather, the lame attempts by Snyder to disguise this and feed it back to the public as some kind of female empowerment.  Sure, these attractive young women are dressed in kinky leather outfits, short skirts and school-girl uniforms; sure, they pout with their plumped up lips and pose suggestively at the camera.  But, but… they’re also saving the world at the same time! No, Zack, that is not feminism.  Queen Gorgo in 300? Sure, she gets to defeat the scheming political rival, but only after she’s been used as a 3 minute sexy interlude between the fighting, then subjected to an attempted rape.  It’s exploitative, and gleefully targeted at hormonal man-boys who should know better.

Well there we go… you may agree, you may disagree.  Hopefully you’ll agree.  By now you’re problem either a fan or you’re not.  But I guess these 5 reasons all boil down to the one problem I have with him: Zack Snyder is gratuitous! His films are gratuitous!  After all, he made a film about viking owls… IN SLOW MOTION!

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Of Gods and Men, reviewed

So, the Golden Globes came and went, and on the whole my predictions were quite accurate (in other words, the awards were extremely predictable).  Burlesque is now the Golden Globe-winning Burlesque, Paul Giamatti did in fact trump Johnny Depp (much to my relieved surprise), and The Social Network remains the front-runner going into the Oscars.

Perhaps a bit of an upset was the victory of the little-known Danish film In A Better World, which beat out the more popular Biutiful and I Am Love. But one film which wasn’t nominated (I hope for eligibility reasons) and which also, unbelievably, has been omitted from the nine-film Oscar shortlist, is the French drama Of Gods and Men. Just to recap, that was a shortlist of NINE films – not even the final shortlist of 5 – that OGAM didn’t make it into.  Well, after seeing it today, I can only say that I am shocked.  If there are truly nine better foreign films this year, I will eat my, and anybody else’s, hat.

It’s a remarkably moving, quiet and artful drama about a group of French monks living in Algeria, who, upon facing the threat of radical Islamic extremists, are forced to question their situation in the country, and ultimately their faith itself.  Based on a true story (one which, fortunately for the film’s ending, I knew nothing about beforehand), it’s a powerful tale of courage and spiritual belief, and a real-life unsolved mystery which certainly merits further research.

Among the many exceptional scenes in the film, there’s one towards the end that is one of the most extraordinary things I’ve seen for a while.  The monks are sitting around a table, having made their decision whether to stay or leave, and one of them puts a cassette of Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake on a little tape player.  While this swirls and cascades from the soundtrack, the camera proceeds to move gracefully around the table from face to face in a series of ever-tightening close-ups.  And boy, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a bunch of more fascinating faces.  All the cast are incredibly natural and authentic, and in this scene you can see their full realisation of their choices, their acceptance of fate, their love for each other and for God, and it’s really a tremendous scene.

Up until that point the film had been very deliberately paced, very methodical and quite cold and rational, in a way that reminded me of Robert Bresson’s Diary of a Country Priest. Some shots of the monks against a barren, desolate landscape, set to their beautiful hymns, achieved a spiritual significance that really quite moved me, despite my lack of religious beliefs.  (That’s a striking point about the film – it doesn’t require a theological interest or any particular faith, and you get the feeling the director doesn’t have any pro-Christian intentions either, just a deep humanist love.)  But the Last Supper sequence blew me away, and made me forget the film’s tendency to drag somewhat.

In short, you really ought to watch Of Gods and Men. It’s not a typical film in any way, and even if you think you know the story, it might not be what you expect in terms of how it deals with the emotional impact of the monks’ dilemma.  But it’s really beautifully shot, acted and directed, with some unforgettable moments.  Shame on you, Oscars: this must surely be the best foreign film of the year.

 

 

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Golden Globes predictions

So, if my trans-continental timezone maths is correct, the stars should be just hitting the red carpet for this year’s Golden Globes and the ceremony should be starting in the next few hours!  I would stay up and cover it live, but frankly, I really don’t care.  The Golden Balls have had less than zero integrity for many years now, and this year’s nominations were pretty disappointing, especially the hilariously bad Comedy/Musical categories.  But I guess that’s part of their appeal, and I’m still going to make my predictions, if I can just squeeze them out in time.  I really can’t see too many upsets tonight, although Best Director could plausibly go any of 4 ways and still be deserved (I’m excluding David O Russell – sorry! Nothing personal).

Best Motion Picture – Drama

The Social Network – although The King’s Speech could cause an upset

Best Motion Picture – Comedy or Musical

In an absolute joke of a shortlist it must be The Kids Are Alright otherwise I will cry a little bit inside

Best Actor – Drama

Colin Firth (The King’s Speech)

Best Actress – Drama

Natalie Portman (Black Swan)

Best Actor – Comedy

Johnny Depp (Alice in Wonderland) will probably unfortunately beat Paul Giammatti

Best Actress – Comedy

Annette Bening (The Kids Are Alright)

Best Supporting Actor

Christian Bale (The Fighter)

Best Supporting Actress

Tough one, but I think it’s between Melissa Leo and Amy Adams (both forThe Fighter)

Best Director

Should be David Fincher for The Social Network, although I’d love it to be Aronofsky

Best Screenplay

The Social Network, Aaron Sorkin

Best Original Song

“Coming Home” from Country Strong – they seem to love this sort of stuff

Best Original Score

The Social Network although I still can’t believe How To Train Your Dragon wasn’t nominated

Best Animated Film

Toy Story 3

Best Foreign Language Film

I Am Love

Well there we go, I’m quietly confident about those but we shall see tonight!  Whoever the winners or losers may be, it’s all just a dress rehearsal for the grown-up awards yet to come, where, somehow, I don’t see Johnny Depp or Burlesque being nominated. But the big winner tonight? My favourite film of last year, The Social Network.

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Welcome to ScreenGrabber

Evenin’ folks. If you’ve made it this far, maybe you’re willing to come a little further…

2011 has just begun and on my list of rather unfeasible resolutions, in there amongst the already broken and/or given up, just one remains.  It’s something that I’d previously thought about doing but, scared of commitment as I am, had always been a bit reluctant to actually begin: writing a movie blog.  Perhaps as a student I have too much time on my hands.  Maybe I need to vent my pent up frustrations stemming from the monumentally disappointing 2010.  Or perhaps it was watching Film 2011 with Claudia Winkleman that gave me the final kick I needed.  If she is qualified to be the BBC’s beacon of all things cinematic, the insightful mind to whom we can all turn for intelligent, informed film discussion, then, frankly, we may as well all give it a go.  (I have nothing against her as a quirky and enthusiastic, if ever so slightly terrifying, host. But she’s no Sergei Eisenstein.)

Are those eyes real or have they been drawn on?

 

Therefore I will be sharing my views and voicing my opinions on all matters movie-related in the coming year, just as a little year-long experiment.  I mean how hard can it be, right?!  So come with me as we traverse the landscape of cinema in 2011 – there’ll be weekly reviews of new releases, Hollywood news, insider gossip (which when I say insider, means from inside my imagination), maybe some classic film reviews, and much more.

So it’s Lights, Camera, Action.  Curtain up.  And other such cinema metaphors.

Make your own punchline.

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